An Honorary Spanish Diva, I am

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

New Year

So this past weekend was very eventful. We finally moved to the new apartment, now its just a matter of picking up lotsa little things that eventually add up (3 trips and counting) but the hard part is over. For the most part it was an easy move though the movers broke my computer desk's arm so now I have to get that replaced. The wood was broken from the hinge so I dunno if I can drill it or fix it. In a way I see this as a new year because from this point I only see upsides and changes, both here and personal and career wise.

Also, this weekend was pride. I am going to say this honestly and openly because I use this tool to vent and communicate my happenings to you all. I had a LOUSY time at Pride. It was a combination of things with one incident making it all boil.


First off, I was worried because, as you all know, I am currently not working full time and receiving benefits from the State. So I didn't get my check which I was expecting and its still not here! I don't know if it's the new address or what but I haven't panicked yet, this isn't the first time there's been a delay in the mail. I was already downtrodden in my mood about me not having money for pride so, it was hard. Then that morning was a disaster because I haven't unpacked everything and the apartment is still full of boxes. I had an outfit layed out that I was going to wear and at the last minute I LOST it! Unbelievable as it may sound its true! So i had to wear something all wrinkled and plain that I found in a hamper and went off, with my mood already on the borderline of wanting to stay home.

And then the pinnacle. My bf for whatever reason made his Pride plans around his straight girl co-worker who I honestly have not hung around with very often and acts like a typical girl, attention deficient, self centered and constantly talking about nonsense mostly about herself. So it's safe to say that although I don't know her very well, she irks me at times. Keep that in mind for what I am about to say.

So on the way to pride she asked about my job hunt. Now of course with this situation I really don't tend to talk about it as I spend enough time worrying about it on my own I don't need to make it a topic of conversation at social gatherings. Unless of course it's a networking even to which of course this was not. I said it was going and she said "Go work at McDonald's". I just ignored that one and said "yeah ok whatever" to which she replied "Since when do you have principles"?

Do you all see where this is headed? Yes, at this point, still keeping quiet and just kinda brushing it off, I started to think "who the fuck does she think I am, her best friend??". THEN came the next incident, I was commenting on how its always my stroke of luck that when drunk I always have the urge to go #2! Lol, I know this is awful but its happened like 5 times. And I hadn't gone that day so I was worried it would occur again. So then she goes ahead and says another comment..."Just do what all the unemployed people do and take a dump behind a dumpster". At this point I really didn't care for that and I said "fuck you" and looked away, still trying to avoid a full on confrontation.

And now here is where it got ugly. I have no idea what was wrong with this stupid bitch thinking that she could talk that way or comment on me in that matter, but she said "Awww..Tower closed and now you can't find a job". OMG, that's when I really got pissed and told her that she's really out of line and that's not cool. It's none of her business as to how I get payed and she had no right to make cracks like that. And in any case, why should I offer you any explanations about my life, who the fuck are you to feel as if you have some sort of right to tell anyone what to do?

WHO the fuck do you think you are? You don't know me like that and I really don't understand the need for this. I have never even commented on this persons work or personal life, EVER, and suddenly she feels she has the right to make comments like this? I was so angry and annoyed.

Surely this sounds like unnecessary drama for me on a day where its supposed to be for me, a gay guy with my boyfriend. And did he say something to HIS friend about this. NO! That's the part that really surprised me. And as silly as it may sound, I did not say anything in the respect to my boyfriend about this because I naively wanted him to have a good time. I figured he deserved it. I mean if I were to invite one of my Friends or co-workers and he made a comment about my boyfriend out of a personal topic like that, rest assured I would immediately take action and say "Dude, not cool at all. Do not disrespect my bf like that. I'm not going to make him uncomfortable, I think you better leave". That never happened. But after the initial altercation, this stupid bitch at first tried to brush it off as if me being upset was no big deal with "Oh let's squash it and move on" to which I responded with a FUCK YOU OK?. She then tried to hug me to which I pushed her away, got in her face and told her to get away from me, that she and I are done and not come near me.


Now for those who know me personally, I know that i have my history of off-colour remarks at times but can someone honestly come up and tell me that I said things of this nature when not necessarily knowing them on a friend-to-friend basis? I really don't even make cracks like this to my good friends, let alone from someone who is merely an acquaintance of my boyfriend. I could never see myself saying anything this INSENSITIVE to anyone that I either met not too long ago or don't know as well.

So all throughout pride, I tried my best to have a good time and let my bf have one as well but it really wasn't working. I guess people must have thought I was already wasted as I was quiet and uninspired but I tried. I'm letting all this go and hopefully I will get over the hurt of my love of my life allowing one of his friends to treat me like that on our day of celebration. I will hopefully get over the fact that he doesn't see the big picture and will probably still allow this friend at our functions. I will hopefully get over the fact he didn't and hasn't stuck up for me as I would for him in this kind of occurence. I will hopefully get over the disappointment but as of now, I'm not there yet. All I know is that this is a reminder of the kind of people I will deal with even though I ever expected to be subjected to this in this manner and at MY social function by one of my bf's guests.


Thank you all for reading and should the guilty party find this post, rest assured that I have now a full reason to spit in your face. I hope someday you'll reflect and study what you say and who you say it to because you got off easy with me. Maybe one day you can buy a brain and tact and realize who you can say things to and in what matter.

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